Skeletons in the Closet
by Anki-Shai
Summary: Sometimes you have to fight yourself against the dark crawling up your chest. Sometimes evil finds a way and, isn't that just great? HitsuMatsu.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: No, Bleach is not mine. If it was there would be more HitsuMatsu moments and Gin would be even more adorable and appear more than Aizen. But I'm not complaining (too much) Tite Kubo (the real author of Bleach) is doing an excellent job ^_^**

**Name: Skeletons in the Closet **(thanks to Rachel for suggesting it)

**Pairing: **obviously HitsuMatsu. Side pairings: UlquiHime, IchiRuki and...mentions of past RanGin.

**Rating: **T because of some strong language and some...violence. But it could become a M rated. We'll see.

**Summary: **"I hurt her. I…wanted to take her…to break her…" said Toshiro, each one of his words emphasized by a punch, "I made her tremble in fear and left a bruise on her neck, proof of what I almost did to her.

**Warnings: **DarkToshiro!! Okay, I tried to work with a dark version of Toshiro. But maybe he isn't as dark as I want him. Anyway, he is going to be really OoC and also a little too violent.

**Author's Note:** Another story that I hope you like, this si not going to be too long and I'm still working on it. We'll see how it goes. As always comments, advices and other things (as long as you don't flame) are welcome. By the way, I change my pen name from KatonRyuuka to Anki-Shai. Just so you know.

And as always, thanks to Rachel who help me a great deal with my gramar and other things.

So, Read, enjoy and review!! you know? to know if you like it and all!

* * *

**Chapter one**

**The shadow in between**

Rangiku had never been afraid of him.

That did not mean, of course, she did not feel hurt by his words or hesitant and nervous because of his actions.

Because she did.

Every time he would turn his cold, emotionless, teal eyes to her or when he tried to repress her with his mere presence, using his reiatsu.

In those moment she not only felt hurt but also nervous and slightly afraid, but not of him but for him. It seemed every time she tried to do the right thing with him, he just kept slipping away, giving in to whatever darkness had been engulfing his heart and mind in the last year.

This was one of those situations. One of those situations in which she had pressed him too much. She had tried too hard and now he was displeased.

She could feel the cold, hard surface of the wall behind her. He was pressing her against the wall. His left hand closed dangerously tight around her neck, his eyes narrowed and cold.

Rangiku stared back at her Taichou; she always did when she had the opportunity to be this close to him. It made her hope; it made her look deep inside his teal eyes and look for just the right gleam, the one that would tell her the Taichou she knew and loved was still there. That he was still there waiting for her to help him back into the light.

She cracked a smile at her thoughts.

She remembered the first time Hyorinmaru contacted her for help. She remembered the dragon saying to her she was like the sun giving its light to the moon. How ironic. All this time, and even more so after Gin's betrayal, her Taichou had been her light. For her, he had always been her sun.

He tilted his head but, otherwise, he didn't move. His eyes were still fixated on her, waiting for some kind of explanation for her actions. She almost rolled her eyes. She had already told him what her feelings were and what she wanted. He was merely in denial. And the more in denial he was, the more she would press. She wouldn't let him go, she wouldn't lose him.

As if reading her mind he let out an exasperated sigh and his voice, raspy, deep and low, reached her ears, sending a shiver of excitement through her body. Not the right reaction since he also sounded dangerously angry at her.

"Why? Why do you insist on pestering me with these…insignificant things?" This time his eyes did show her his anger and his traces of hatred. Something that wasn't there before the war.

"I'm tired of it. I'm tired of you," his words were stressed by his left hand closing even more strongly around her neck, making her breaths short and labored. "You know I could easily kill you? Maybe like that I would finally get a fukutaichou that actually helps and doesn't keep meddling in my business."

He expected to get some kind of reaction from her, something else apart from seriousness and indifference or worry. But he was disappointed. Instead of seeing fear or surprise or even anger he found her looking at him with tenderness and something else he did not know how to define.

It wasn't the first time she looked at him in such a way. And it always made him…doubtful and desperate.

She should hate him!

She should be afraid of him!

She should despise him!

He had been doing everything in his power for her to stop looking at him like that!

For her to want nothing to do with him!

But she always came back with a new strategy, with new words, with new smiles.

"You enjoy making me look like an idiot, right?" he said, ignoring the look in her eyes. Pressing her to try and do something, to try and make her leave him. "Did you think you could do it with this idiotic celebration? That this time you could bring out the _'real'_ me?"

He smirked in a nasty way, Rangiku frowned when she saw Toshiro's smirk. It wasn't the kind of thing he would do. Outside the sound of an explosion followed by multicolored flowers in the sky indicated the beginning of the fireworks.

For a moment Rangiku regretted missing the spectacle. She had been expecting to take her Taichou with her and made him enjoy the fireworks with her. Just like the old times. But this time without Aizen and Hinamori.

"Taichou, I didn't want to make a fool of you. According to Orihime, Valen…ugh…" Her words were cut off by Toshiro closing his hand even more on her neck.

"I was speaking. When I speak, Matsumoto-fukutaichou, you remain silent."

Matsumoto's eyebrow lifted and her eyes gleamed with the slightest trace of rebellion. She had never been an easy opponent, always putting up a fight even in the worst situation. It was a characteristic that usually exasperated her enemies, or, in this, case her Taichou.

"I don't understand you. And frankly, I don't want to," he said. His voice was now hard and cold, almost indifferent. "Like I said, I got tired of you. As soon as the morning arrives I'm going to ask for your transfer. You can rot in hell for all I care. I can't stand your presence anymore."

His words had hurt her deeply. The venom in his voice, the cold hatred…He had never been the same after the winter war. Hinamori's death was still too fresh, too close for him to let it go and to forgive himself.

The moment he had recovered he had dedicated himself to his duty. There was nothing else around him but duty and training. He even made Kenpachi proud at his fierceness and aggressiveness, at his lack of care for the well being of the people around him as long as his mission and his enemies were accomplished.

He was still so hurt. Not only physically but emotionally. He still wore the scars Aizen had made when he cut his left arm and leg. A scar that had marred his face and taken part of the beauty he once wore. She could remember the moment Orihime healed him, even after she was done it was obvious he would never completely restore his arm or leg. And the scar on his face would always be with him.

A reminder that he failed.

And Matsumoto hated it; she hated it because she knew he hadn't failed. Because he was blaming himself for something it wasn't his fault at all. And because she hated the person he had become she fought him so hard. Because she loved him too much, she would not let him go without a fight.

Toshiro's smirk grew and Matsumoto noticed a gleam of triumph in his eyes. Finally he had done it; he had hurt her enough to make her look weak for once. Toshiro was satisfied with the reaction. He had made her falter, he had made her evade his look.

Toshiro's triumph, however, didn't last too long.

He froze where he stood when she lifted her hand to caress his cheek tenderly. Her smile was sad and her eyes reflected the hurt they had showed moments before. His hold on her neck faltered when her hand mapped out the scar on his face and she seemed to lean closer to him.

Toshiro's mind was trying to process what was happening and why. Even if he hated to admit it, Matsumoto was warm. She was temptation. She was a weakness to him. She was the link to sanity…to the happiness he was so decided to deny himself.

_Pathetic_.

He promised himself to not have any kind of weakness, he promised himself to get rid of them. Even if it hurt too much, because that was the only way he would not fail again. That was the only way he could protect…the only way he wouldn't be defeated…

He looked at her with an offended expression, affronted by her actions, by the way she was making him feel.

Why? Why did she have such a power to distress him? Why did he feel the tug in his heart? Why?!

Matsumoto was aware of her Taichou's discomfort. She knew, and saw, the old him there. The one who would get confused at her advances and flirty tones. Now, she would have to be very careful, this was a moment in which she could progress with him and make him opened up to her or…things cold just go to hell.

Rangiku's eyes softened and, somehow, her touches became more intimate, warm and affectionate. Toshiro's eyes opened slightly and he was starting to give in.

That's when Matsumoto made a mistake, while touching his scar she mumbled in a husky tone, "You really are handsome, Taichou. You grew to be a handsome man."

His demeanor changed completely.

His turquoise eyes went a frightening black color before returning to normal. But the coldness and lifeless expression in them sent a shiver of fear through Matsumoto's back.

What just happened? What was that fluctuation in her Taichou's reiatsu? What was that…strange reaction she noticed in his eyes?

Her questions went unanswered as Toshiro, with great speed and strength, tossed Matsumoto to the floor hovering above her, pinning her to the floor with his hands and body.

He was closer than ever but instead of feeling adventurous or surprised, Matsumoto felt scared. A feeling she never before felt with her Taichou.

It was just his eyes, his sudden and unnecessary strength used against Rangiku, the position they were in. His face was a mask of indifference and sheer desperation.

"Don't mock me, Matsumoto." His voice was empty and cold, just as lifeless as his eyes and the hold he had on her neck and right wrist tightened.

"I know I'm not 'handsome'." He said tilting his head to the side to make the scar on his face more visible. "This scar on my face…the ones on my chest and back…the scars you can see and that will never heal…"

Rangiku watched with open eyes as Toshiro looked at her, his face changing into something Matsumoto didn't want to see on him. It wasn't Hitsugaya Toshiro at all…it was as if someone else, something else, was acting for him.

Or maybe Matsumoto felt so much for her Taichou she wanted it to be someone else and not Toshiro. She didn't want a repeat performance of what her relationship with Gin was.

"This things on my skin, on my soul…on my mind…" said Tōshirō, smirking in a rather frightening and cold way. "These things only show how bad I am, how much of a monster I am."

"You…Taichou, you're not a monster," she mumbled and hated that her voice sounded weak and trembling.

Again, there was a flash of black coming from the corners of the white part of his eyes. Matsumoto didn't have time to react to the event since Toshiro neared her, his reiatsu pinned her to the floor, making made her felt weak and cold.

Then, he laughed.

And Matsumoto didn't know if she should feel surprised or more scared than before. She had never heard him laugh like that and she certainly didn't want to hear him laugh in such a way ever again. After a few seconds he stopped and his voice sent Matsumoto's senses into alarm, and Haineko into a restless pacing in their inner world, asking for her mistress to let her out.

"You should know about it, shouldn't you, Matsumoto?" he asked. "You should know about monsters since you fucked one, right? Several times, if I am correct."

She gasped in surprise and couldn't help but feel hurt by Toshiro's words. He, however, didn't even flinch at her reaction. On the contrary, Matsumoto would dare to say, he was enjoying it and the mere thought sent some tears to Rangikus' eyes. What had happened to her Taichou? Where was the man she had fallen in love with a long time ago?

"Yes, maybe you miss him," said Toshiro, raising a white eyebrow. "Maybe that's why you've been chasing after me. You miss fucking a monster like Gin, so you decided to come after me. I can be just as good in bed as Gin."

Toshiro was hovering above Rangiku, dangerously close to her, and after his words Rangiku felt helpless. And terrified.

What did he mean by his comment? Did he…no, even as messed up as he was he wouldn't think of…of hurting Rangiku in such a way, right?

His eyes were dark and emotionless; his face was tense while his lips formed a tense grimace.

"This is what you want, right?" he said lowering his face until his lips were near Rangiku's ear. She could only tremble lightly. "This is why you've been chasing after me the last year, inviting me to useless celebrations, spending time with me, whether I want it or not…"

Rangiku could feel a single tear roll down her cheek when Toshiro's lips closed slightly on her lobe. "Right, Matsumoto? Answer me, would you like a monster like me to fuck you?"

The hand around her neck started moving lower and Rangiku couldn't suppress the trembling of her body and the small sob that escape her lips.

Was he serious?

For the first time ever, Matsumoto Rangiku felt scared of Hitsugaya Toshiro. For the first time ever she didn't feel safe, but rather threatened by his presence. Haineko growled with rage inside her and was begging for Rangiku to call out to her.

Toshiro moved his lips from Matsumoto's ear lobe to her face and it was then his turquoise eyes found the expression she was wearing.

It was the look of pure helplessness and pure fear that made him snap out of whatever trance he had been in.

Toshiro watched and noticed for the first time she was trembling and tears were falling from her eyes. She wasn't looking at him but rather to the other side. Her body was tensed and her reiatsu was screaming in fear.

What was he doing?

Toshiro stood up so fast he startled Rangiku. His back found the solid wall behind him, while his eyes were still on Rangiku.

He lifted a hand to his hair and grabbed it rather forcibly. What was he doing? Did he really…did he really say all those things to her? Did he was about to….?

He couldn't even finish the thought for fear of the answer. Toshiro felt some kind of pain in his chest; he found it difficult to breathe properly, to think.

His pain only intensified when his eyes found Rangiku's. She was scared of him, he had…he had failed another precious person yet again.

**I told you, didn't I? Toshiro-chan…you are a failure, you are a monster…monsters are meant to destroy or be destroyed…**

Toshiro's eyes opened wide at the sinister voice inside his head. As fast as he could, he left the place, leaving Rangiku on the floor, scared and crying, wondering what the hell had happened.

* * *

The guards at the front door of the hidden prison stepped aside. They knew the young Captain, and Soi Fong-Taichou had order them to let the man pass whenever he needed it. Besides, the way he was moving and made his presence known told the guards it would be better to not disturb him.

Though, they couldn't help but feel slightly sorry for the prisoner the man was obviously going to see.

He kept walking, knowing his way around what others called the Maggots Nest. He didn't even bother with the people around him; his destination was on the floors below.

It didn't take him too long. He stood in front of a middle sized room; the man he was looking for was sitting on a corner. He didn't move while his hand went for the key he had been entrusted with. The figure in the corner chuckled lightly but didn't make any attempt to greet the newcomer.

Once the cell was opened, Hitsugaya Toshiro walked to the man until his shadow hovered above him. Their eyes met, or rather, Hitsugaya tried to meet the always closed eyes of the man.

There was a moment of silence; neither of them said anything for a moment. Suddenly, Hitsugaya's fist collided with the man's face; the man, however, didn't do anything. He was used to the young Taichou's visits and he usually ended up being used as a dummy doll.

"I hurt her," said Toshiro and his voice was loud and firm. The man flinched in surprise while Toshiro looked at him with an expressionless face only betrayed by the obvious pain in his turquoise eyes.

"I hurt her. I…wanted to take her…to break her…" said Toshiro, each one of his words emphasized by a punch, "I made her tremble in fear and left a bruise on her neck, proof of what I almost did to her. What I was ready to… _urgh_…"

Toshiro didn't finish his little speech; he was stopped by a punch directly to his face. He stood startled for a moment before cracking a bitter smile. This was the first time Ichimaru Gin hit him back. And, truth be told, that's what Toshiro had been looking for.

He wanted to be hurt; he wanted to pay for his sins, his wrong doings. And the irony of the situation was the traitor was being the one making him pay.

Hitsugaya Toshiro didn't care anymore.

He just wanted to stop feeling. To stop hurting the people he loved.

"I almost enjoyed it…when I hurt her," said Toshiro, smiling, enjoying the red eyes that were looking at him with utter hatred and anger.

"My, Hitsugaya-chan, it seems like Aizen-taichou's parting gift is finally getting to you," commented the man with a sadistic smile. Toshiro's smile vanished and he, once again, punched Gin in the stomach.

From then on Hitsugaya let out his frustrations, his fears, his failures, let them take the form of mindless violence against Gin, while the other man tried to hurt Toshiro both physically and emotionally.

* * *

It took Rangiku several hours to compose herself and stood up from the position her taichou had left her in. She wiped away the tears from her face and lifted a hand to massage her bruised neck.

In front of her was a very pissed off Haineko. Her zanpakutou was fuming, walking around in circles and holding her tongue for the moment. Rangiku knew that sooner or later she would share with her what she thought about the situation.

"You should have called me! I would have put the little twerp in his place!" said Haineko, finally sharing her thoughts. "I don't know what the hell his problem is but if he thinks I'm going to let him land a hand on you again…"

"It's not your choice, is it?" interrupted Rangiku looking tired. Haineko opened her mouth to reply but nothing came. She huffed, realizing Rangiku was right. The only thing Haineko could do without the help of the woman was scratch the man.

"I still think he was out of place and you should have done something," continued Haineko. "It's not like you to let people get away with this kind of treatment"

Rangiku nodded her head but otherwise she didn't say anything else; instead her mind was re-playing the events that had taken place hours ago.

She would never justify her Taichou's behavior, mainly because she knew he was out of place. He wasn't being reasonable and was acting like the jerk he had become after the war. But…there was something…his eyes and his reiatsu…

"…and don't even get me started on Hyorinmaru! The stupid dragon didn't hear me when I told him to stop his Master!" rambled on Haineko, "seriously what's wrong with those two?"

"Haineko," the Ash-cat turned her attention to Rangiku and was kind of curious at the serious and contemplative tone in her Mistress voice. "Did you…did you notice something different about Taichou?"

"You mean apart from the fact he almost ra-"

"Yes," cut her Rangiku rather rudely. Haineko had the decency to look ashamed.

"Well, now that you mention it, he…he didn't feel well," said Haineko. "And Hyorinmaru was more distant than usual, it was kind of hard for me to feel him when in another moment it was so easy."

Haineko blushed slightly at the last part but Rangiku ignored her in favor of this new information. So, she hadn't been the only one to notice it? Rangiku sighed heavily, tired and troubled by the recent events.

"Rangiku?" Haineko neared her mistress and settled herself on a chair. Rangiku offered her a sad smile.

"I need a bath. And probably a good night's sleep," she said, standing up. "Tomorrow I'm going to find out exactly what's wrong with my Taichou."

"We can't lose them, right? Toshiro-kun and Hyorinmaru-kun, I mean." Haineko purred in agreement with her Mistress.

Neither of them shared their own fears and worries about the situation, and neither of them dared to voice their suspicions. But both of them decided to not let someone like Toshiro and Hyorinmaru slip away without a fight.

* * *

So, hate it? love it? Opinions and other things are welcome. Don't forget to review give me your opinions or ideas if you have some!

Thanks for reading!


	2. The Dark Side of the Moon

Hi there!

Well, I have to thank you guys for the comments! I love you al! I was really reluctant about this because of the serious OcC and the situations, but I'm glad, so far, you like the story.

So here is chapter 2!

Read and Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter 2**

**The dark side of the moon  
**

It was still dark when he opened his eyes to the darkness of the room. The blankets over his body were too warm and suffocating for him, so very slowly he started taking them off while trying to remember the events of the night before.

This ended up being a mistake from his part.

His body was hurting all over and he still could feel the punches he received from the traitor. But that wasn't the worst of it; his memory was bringing back what he had almost done to Matsumoto. Guiltiness filled him when his mind replayed his misbehaviour. When he remembered he had failed yet another loved one.

Putting a hand on his side, Toshiro sat up and moved to the side of the bed. He wanted to leave the Fourth Division and go directly to his office. If there was something about last night he would actually do it was sign the transfer papers for Rangiku.

_Of course; she would be better off if she is away from you, Master._ Toshiro cringed at the icy tone coming from Hyorinmaru. The dragon had never talked to him in such a way, he was usually more familiar and…warm. But, could he blame him?

'_I know it bothers you, but…'_

_Save it, Master. I'm getting tired of your excuses. _And with those words Hyorinmaru cut his link with Toshiro.

The young Captain sighed exasperatedly, lost and confused. His fight last night with Gin had done nothing to improve his mood or his feelings. If anything, it made the situation even worse. To see how desperate the man was to protect Rangiku, to still stand by her side where Toshiro had failed to do so.

"Ah, I see you have woken up, Hitsugaya-taichou." Toshiro didn't have to turn to know Ukitake was behind him. He didn't need to turn around to know and visualize the disappointment in Ukitake's eyes.

"Anything I can do for you, Ukitake-soutaichou?" Ukitake pursed his lips in disapproval while walking towards the young Captain.

"You did it again, didn't you?" Toshiro tensed up at the question but he didn't say anything, merely followed Ukitake's presence walking around the room. "Only this time he responded in kind to your treatment. And this is the first time he has done this, which leads me to what I came here to talk to you about: why?"

Toshiro tilted his head to evade Ukitake's piercing eyes on him, "I don't understand what you are trying to say."

"Why did Ichimaru Gin hit you back when he had never done so before?" said Ukitake and his voice was filled with authority. "He must have a good reason, and let's not forget your reason _this_ time to go over there and hit the man."

Time seemed to freeze for a few minutes in which Toshiro thought of all the possible answers he could give Ukitake without giving away too much. The man was already disappointed in him, he didn't need to give him yet another reason.

"I don't know what are you talking about, Ukitake," said Toshiro with an even and collected voice. "I went down there to…relax some and the situation got out of hand."

Ukitake let his eyes fall on the figure of Hitsugaya Toshiro and the man couldn't help but wonder what had gone wrong to lead Toshiro to his present attitude. It was not the first time he fought with the prisoner, but it also was not the first time he was hurt and recovering in the Fourth division. Though this time it seemed to be for different, and more dangerous, reasons than fighting with Ichimaru.

Ukitake closed his eyes and made his way to the door. Just before he left he tried once more, "Are you sure, Hitsugaya-taichou? You don't have anything else to say?"

"No, I don't," answered Toshiro after a moment of hesitation.

"So, this has nothing to do with Rangiku-san's marks on her neck? You didn't have anything to do with it? " tried Ukitake once more. This time there was a change in Toshiro; he tensed up and his reiatsu flickered with strong emotions before being concealed once again.

Toshiro finally turned and locked his eyes to Ukitake's, the new soutaichou frowned at the half smirk Toshiro was presenting him. "Again, what are you talking about, Ukitake? I haven't seen my lieutenant since yesterday afternoon."

Ukitake's disappointment was evident and for a brief moment Toshiro regretted his words and his attitude. There was a long moment of silence, then with a last glance Ukitake left. Toshiro turned his attention to the window, feeling a little hurt and confused but not knowing why exactly he was feeling that way.

He had done what he had wanted to do, right?

* * *

It was already late when Matsumoto entered the office at the Tenth division barracks. She had felt nervous at first, thinking about her Taichou and how awkward it would be for them to see each other again after what had happened the night before.

But he wasn't there when she arrived.

The office was empty and, to outsiders, it would look as if no one had been there early in the morning. But Matsumoto wasn't an outsider, and she was so used to her Taichou's presence that she could still feel traces of his reiatsu about.

Unwittingly, she lifted a hand to her neck, caressing it softly while she made her way to her desk, the memory of last night still fresh and pressing inside her mind. What was worst was that Shunsui and Ukitake had seen the marks of Toshiro's fingers around her neck.

She tried to convince them it wasn't anything to worry about and the man who had done it had already paid. They didn't look convinced and Matsumoto knew why. She had made plans for the night before to spend her time with her Taichou; she had talked about those plans to almost everyone she needed to get involved or merely wanted to hear her.

What was more; Ukitake had seen her and Toshiro leave the place together. But, she couldn't say anything, she couldn't confirm their suspicious because…

_You don't have a valid reason, eh? _Rangiku shook her head to Haineko's words. Her zanpakutou snorted but remained silent, waiting for Rangiku to say or do something.

'_This is something I have to do alone.'_

_He is stronger than you. _The implications of that fact had already been considered by Rangiku. She knew what Haineko meant and she understood her zanpakutou's concern. The thing was, no one knew her Taichou the way she did. Not even Haineko.

_I know that, Rangiku. But, Hyorinmaru knows Hitsugaya better than you._

'_What's that suppose to mean? You mean Hyorinmaru has given up on Toshiro? Isn't it a zanpakutou's duty to communicate with his master?'_

_Only if said Master wanted to do the same; in Hitsugaya's case he has stopped._ There was a pause from Haineko and Rangiku felt her hesitation and trepidation. A characteristic she would never relate to her zanpakutou, which made her realize Haineko was hiding something.

'_Haineko, if you know something…'_

_Sorry, Rangiku. But is not my secret to tell._

The woman was about to reply to her zanpakutou's words when something caught her attention. On her desk was a single piece of paper whereas the rest of the desk, even her Taichou's, lacked paperwork.

Matsumoto looked over at the sheet of paper and scowled at it. It was a transfer form, her transfer form to be more precise.

It had been filled with her Taichou's neat and careful handwriting, requesting her immediate transfer to the division she would like to go to. The only thing left for her was her signature and the transfer would be official, it even had Ukitake's signature.

He really wanted her gone, far away from him.

Memories of the happenings the night before tried to invade Matsumoto's mind but the woman shook them away.

With a smile that was both sad and amused at the same, time she crumpled the paper and threw it in the trash can.

What had happened the night before was in the past, it had been scary and she had felt…a lot of things she didn't want to remember. But now was the present and she had already decided to do something, to not give up on him.

Though, in this case, she had to go back to the past. Did her Taichou really think she would obey? That she would sign the form?

It wasn't the first time he did something like this, ten years after he had been named her Taichou, the boy was fed up with her lack of enthusiasm for office work and her fixation with parties and drinks. He actually signed her transfer form and told her in her face he wanted her gone.

Haineko chuckled and Rangiku smiled a little when she remembered how she had cried and told her Taichou she would change and do her share of the work.

Her Taichou was already hesitant about his decision, uncomfortable because he had made the woman cry; but Matsumoto had to admit, it was thanks to Gin's intervention her Taichou changed his mind immediately. The moment Gin told the white-haired boy of his intentions of getting Rangiku for his squad Toshiro ripped the transfer form and told Rangiku to get to work.

Gin, as traitorous a bastard as he was, knew how to use people for his and Rangiku's benefit.

And well, in not less than 20 minutes she was sleeping on the sofa and her Taichou was doing her share of the paperwork, all thoughts of transferring her forgotten. At least for that moment.

She let out a breathless laugh and went to her favourite sofa, the one located in _her_ division, in _her_ and _her_ _Taichou's_ office.

Would she really sign the paper? Did she really want to go?

No, of course not. There wasn't any other place she would love to stay in than the Tenth division. She had grown there, had become a fukutaichou and had come under the command of the man she now held dearest. The man she had fallen in love with.

That meant she wasn't leaving and she wasn't signing the paper. Her Taichou would have to do more than that to get rid of her.

However, Matsumoto was a considerate woman. She knew she had been pressing her Taichou a lot and she knew how bad he reacted to _her_ pressure. Maybe a few days of her trying not to hit on him, to let him cool off a little would do the both of them some good.

_Surprisingly enough, Rangiku, that seems like an intelligent and considerate option, _Commented Haineko with a smirk.

'_Hey! I can be considerate and all,' _said Rangiku, pouting slightly when her zanpakutou snorted at her comment. _'I really am! Anyway, right now I'm a little sleepy…'_

Rangiku looked around, knowing full well the office was empty and the sofa she was sitting on looked very tempting.

_Well, your Taichou did finish all the paperwork and he's not here…'_

_And we went to bed rather late last night… _continued Rangiku while lying down on the sofa and closing her eyes. '_I think we deserve a short nap.'_

And with that, both Haineko and Rangiku fell asleep.

* * *

It was late in the afternoon.

He landed the last slash and the weak Hollow disappeared in front of him. Blood was pouring from a cut on his forehead and his side was hurting even more after he had escaped successfully from the watchful eye of Unohana-taichou and his wounds had gone unattended.

Stupid Ichimaru had done a good and lucky job on him. If it wasn't for the fact Toshiro was so distressed, the young man knew Ichimaru wouldn't have harmed him at all. Though he had to admit he never expected the traitor to fight back.

"Taichou, I think this was the last one," said one of the seat members of his squad he had taken with him. The man was hesitant and a little fearful; he had never seen his Taichou fight in such a wild manner. And truth be told, he was the only squad member brave enough to even talk with the young Captain.

Toshiro just nodded his head, making the man hesitate for a long moment. As many other officers in the Tenth squad, the man wasn't really sure how to approach his Taichou, not without their lieutenant there to calm down their Captain. Though, sometimes, the woman was more trouble than help for them.

"You can return to Seireitei," said Toshiro in a monotone voice. "I'll file the report later on."

"Yes, Sir," said the man; he turned around but stopped, looking back at Toshiro. "Sir, you…you seem hurt, would like me to call Fourth…?"

"No!" said Toshiro glaring at the man who shuddered. "I'm fine. Go back, this is all for today."

Not wanting to infuriate their Taichou anymore, the squad agreed and all of them turned their backs to their Taichou, who was still looking at the part of the forest in which they had engaged the hollows.

Toshiro massaged his temples, feeling the effects of the headache. However, he couldn't help but admit the fight had been a good way to overcome whatever feelings of guilt he had. He forgot, even if it was just for a few hours, what he had almost done to Rangiku, what the voice inside his head kept telling him to do.

Toshiro grabbed a spot over his clothing just below his chest; the place where he knew the seal had been made to hold the inner voice at bay.

The young Taichou frowned, knowing too well the seal was getting weaker every day and soon it would stop having any influence. What had happened during their patrol was proof enough; he could see the fear and confusion in his men.

So, it was only natural he felt uneasy of the day the seal would wear off and there wasn't anything helping him keep the voice shut.

Toshiro growled and his reiatsu froze the zone around him when memories of a scared Rangiku invaded his mind. Those were images he didn't want to see again. She was something of the past, someone he should forget about. Someone unimportant. The transfer form he had left earlier was proof enough, right?

_If you say so, Master. _

'_What? Tell me now. What are your thoughts about this?'_

_Why should I? _Toshiro could tell Hyorinmaru was hurt and angry with him. _Why should I voice my concerns if you hardly listen to me anymore?_

'_Please; this is getting really old, Hyorinmaru,'_ replied Toshiro, massaging the bridge of his nose, Hyorinmaru hadn't taken too well the transfer and had been trying to convince the young man to forget about it and not do it.

But Toshiro had already made a decision about the matter. Matsumoto should be far away from him, it was better like that for the both of them. Maybe this time he would get a new fukutaichou who actually worked, who he wouldn't get attached to.

Hyorinmaru silently watched his Master with a serious expression, knowing the young man didn't mean any of those thoughts. There was a drift of cold air around the area and the clearing was completely frozen by the time Toshiro started leaving.

Hyorinmaru followed his master silently, still deep in thought about his change in demeanour. It had happened a little after the fight against Aizen and instead of getting better he was getting worse. And Hyorinmaru knew this wasn't about Hinamori anymore.

His Master was becoming a stranger even to him and the dragon was afraid of the consuming darkness, always growing, inside his Master's soul. Something he had used to hurt others, most specifically Rangiku, the woman he held even closer than Hinamori.

Hyorinmaru closed his eyes and remembered how those feelings had changed and would go from an insane obsession to a sincere concern. There were moments in which flashes of the old Hitsugaya would appear only to be replaced with this new version of his Master.

Last night had been the closest thing to his old self he had gotten in the last year. But Hyorinmaru had to admit if the price of recovering Toshiro was losing or… breaking Rangiku, the dragon would make sure that never happened. His soul was already attached to Haineko's, even if they hadn't been able to share a single moment recently.

It didn't take them too long to arrive to the Tenth division barracks, people around him bowed respectfully (and a little fearfully) before disappearing. Toshiro didn't mind them and kept walking towards his office.

He stopped, shocked to feel the faint presence of the same person he had been evading all day.

He opened the door to reveal the sleeping form of Rangiku. His hand closed tightly around it and Toshiro didn't know if he should be angry because she was still there, or feel relieved because she was still there.

Hyorinmaru, however, was pleasantly surprised and a little amused when he noticed his Master's feelings in turmoil. Toshiro took on an inexpressive face and walked directly to where he had left the transfer form earlier. He scanned the desk with his eyes until they felt on the trash can. There was only one paper there and Toshiro had a feeling that was the transfer form.

Toshiro passed a hand through his hair before letting it rest on Rangiku's desk. He took deep, long breaths while thinking about the situation he had at hand. Technically he could ask for a transfer but Ukitake had already made clear Toshiro needed a valid reason. The fact the young man had told Ukitake about her napping and drinking habits didn't do anything at all to change Ukitake's opinion. If it bothered him so much those things, why didn't he say something earlier in his captaincy?

Toshiro clenched his teeth, for the transfer to be effective the three of them had to sign the form Rangiku had just tossed to the trash can! His anger was rising by the minute, making him vulnerable.

_**Aren't you tired with her attitude? You should teach her a lesson she would never forget…last night you failed to do so…today she is asleep…**_

_Toshiro? Master, what are you doing?_

Toshiro pretended he didn't hear Hyorinmaru; he turned around and made his way to where Matsumoto was deeply asleep.

Had anyone been there, they would have noticed the lifeless and cold stare coming from his eyes. His face was just as emotionless when he tilted is head and focused his attention on the sleeping form of the woman in front of him.

So innocent and defenceless.

Sleeping as she was, she wouldn't notice anything until it was too late. He seemed unaware of anything else but her and the sudden desire in his body. A desire he felt only when he was physically close to her, a need and lust he had never felt before. Something that would make him crazy sometimes, but that he was aware was merely physical.

He kneeled in front of her so his face was in front of hers; he turned his teal eyes and had a glimpse of her cleavage. His hand raised itself and started making feather like touches on her skin.

She was warm which made her stirred when Toshiro's cold hand made contact with her skin. He doubted for a moment before returning to what he was doing. His hand went from her neck to her lips.

He let his hand travelled down, decided to cross the line he hadn't dare to cross last night when his eyes fell on the marks around Rangiku's neck. They were faint by now, but still there. Noticeable for whoever wanted to look closer at them.

And Toshiro was closer than ever.

_Toshiro! What the hell do you think you are doing? _came the thunderous voice of Hyorinmaru inside his head.

The young Captain looked down and, with some reluctance, moved his hand away. Whatever he had planned to do to Rangiku was forgotten. If only for a moment, since it was obvious he wanted her.

_You want her?! Is that your justification?_ replied a very indignant Hyorinmaru. _You're letting him use you!  
_

Toshiro lowered his gazed, he felt conflicted and so damned confused. The shadow in the back of his mind started pushing him, whispering, trying to convince him again to do what he wanted to do. Wasn't that the reason he was kneeling in front of a sleeping Rangiku?

He could kill in the most merciless way and pick fights with a man who couldn't (and wouldn't) fight back most of the time, but not take what he wanted?

Toshiro put both of his hands in his head and whispered a rather angry 'shut up! Shut up!' when the sounds of Hyorinmaru's and his inner shadow's voice kept talking to him.

Matsumoto whimpered and moved, startling Toshiro who stood up rather quickly. She turned around, facing the sofa, but otherwise didn't wake up.

Toshiro sighed and decided he needed a drink. Maybe a whole bottle of something. He turned around ready to leave his office but stopped. He looked back at Matsumoto and after a moment of hesitation he walked towards her and placed a single kiss on her cheek before taking off his Captain's haori and covering her up with it.

Rangiku's eyes opened once she felt the presence of her Taichou walk away from their office.

She lay there, thoughtful about what had just happened. Her Taichou's reiatsu had flickered, if only slightly, in the same way it had done last night. And if the woman was honest, in the same way it had done some other, rather countable times.

It hadn't been a nice feeling, but what did it mean? And how long would it take her to find out?

* * *

So, here is chapter 2. Hope you really enjoy it, about Toshiro's voice, someone already figured it out, but we'll see what happens next.

Thanks for reading and don't forget to leave a comment


	3. Black Tears

Hello!!

I'm back with a new chapter and...well, we see what happen. Again thank you guys for the reviews and your patience, everything will be explained at some point.

So here is chapter 3!

Don't forget to read, enjoy and review!!

* * *

**Chapter 3**

**Black Tears**

The room was dark, and, regardless of the room being part of a prison, it was warm and calm. There was no sound breaking the unnatural silence, almost as if that part of the prison was not occupied.

But it was.

In reality it was inhabited by only one person, who was sitting at the moment in the same corner he had sat in ever since he was incarcerated. Ichimaru Gin grimaced at the obvious pain in his left arm, the incredible headache, and his own annoyance.

It wasn't easy to make him annoyed. It wasn't his style; he was always the one bothering others, making them feel anger and hatred. But Ichimaru himself was immune to those feelings.

And yet…stupid Little Shiro-chan always found a way to make him angry, to feel things he hated to feel. Pain, hate, annoyance, jealousy…you name it, the little brat seemed to have an uncanny ability to bring those feelings up.

Gin tried to ease the pain of his arm and ribs; the little brat had been vicious with his attacks the night before. But, Gin wouldn't give him the satisfaction of being victorious; so he did what he did best. He taunted him, provoked him… The man chuckled satisfactorily with what he had said and done to the Chibi Taichou. The boy was so easy to tease, so easy to provoke it was always amusing.

Though, Gin had to admit what the brat had said the night before was quite worrisome. It was one thing for Shiro-chan to hurt others, and an incredibly different thing to hurt Rangiku.

The way the boy had described the attack, his feelings at that moment…it did bother Ichimaru a great deal. He couldn't allow the brat to hurt her; he wouldn't lose the opportunity this time to try and do things the right way with Rangiku. He wouldn't give the satisfaction to Shiro-chan to get any closer to Rangiku, to even lay a hand on her.

Now that Aizen was out of the picture…his own plans could start taking form. He just hoped he could get the satisfaction to end whatever personal fight he had with Hitsugaya. However…

"Eh, but I think for that I will need to get out of here," said Gin with a perplexed look on his face. "What do you say, Shinsou? Shall we leave this place with a bang?"

* * *

Matsumoto and Hitsugaya were looking at each other's eyes. Both of them had their eyes narrowed, trying to decide how to approach the other.

Matsumoto was dying to know where her Taichou had obtained those bruises on his face, while Hitsugaya wanted to know why Matsumoto was still in the Tenth Division. His eyes drifted slightly to the fading marks on Matsumoto's neck.

Both Kyouraku and Ukitake did not know if they should be amused by their antics or maybe worried; lately with those two, no one was sure anymore.

"Where did you get those, Taichou?" It was Matsumoto who was the first one to break the silence, and Toshiro almost cringed at the worried tone of her voice.

"None of your business, _fukutaichou_," he said in a cold tone.

"It is my business, _Taichou,_" she said, cracking a smiled at him. "I'm your fukutaichou after all."

Toshiro almost growled at her obvious statement. Damn, woman!

"I was under the impression I have already clarified your status in the Tenth Division," said Toshiro, looking briefly at Ukitake who preferred to play fool for a moment.

"On the contrary, Taichou. The form is only valid if I sign it or you have a valid and logical reason to transfer me," said Matsumoto; Toshiro wished he could wipe away that smug smirk of hers.

"Well, I think being a lazy drunk counts as enough reason to get rid of you," he said in a lowered tone.

"Ah, yes, that may be…" interrupted Ukitake rather sheepishly, "if you had shown concern since the beginning, Hitsugaya-taichou."

Toshiro scowled, not liking where the conversation was going. "What do you mean?"

"What Jushiro here means is that we all know Ran-chan's…habits," said Kyouraku smiling brightly. "And since it has never bothered you before…well, bringing those things up at this time, after a hundred years, is not a valid reason."

Toshiro clenched his mouth shut and the sudden change in temperature told everyone the young Taichou was about to explode. Kyouraku nudged Ukitake, who nodded briefly.

"So, you see, Hitsugaya-taichou? Your request has been denied," said Ukitake, smiling one last time while Kyouraku mouthed a 'good luck' to Rangiku. "Well, have a pleasant day!"

The door closed behind them and Toshiro and Rangiku were left alone.

Silence fell immediately with both of them deciding to evade each other for the time being. Matsumoto was still standing up in front of her Taichou's desk while Toshiro had turned his chair to look at the big window behind him.

The room went colder and colder by the minute and Rangiku shivered slightly. Toshiro stood up and walked towards the window, from where he could see the backyard garden of the Tenth Division that lead to his private quarters.

After a long moment of silence Matsumoto caved in, deciding it was time to do something.

"Taichou…" she started but was cut off immediately by his stern stare. He massaged the bridged of his nose, letting out a soft and tired sigh.

"Why don't you understand that I want you gone, Matsumoto?" He said. "Do I have to make it an order?"

"Why do you care so much about my being here, Taichou?" she asked, trying to get his attention. "Is it because of what happened last….?"

Toshiro stood up, startling the woman, who didn't get the chance to finish the question, "Don't ever mention that incident again, Fukutaichou."

Their eyes met and for a brief moment she saw the concern and guilt in them, but those feelings were quickly replaced by indifference. Rangiku was about to say something, to ask and keep pushing when Toshiro started talking again.

"Let's discuss this as normal people, no ranks involved," he said suddenly. Rangiku's eyebrows rose in surprise with his comment. "Why didn't you just leave? It would be easy."

Rangiku decided to play along to see where this was going, "Why should I? Here is everything I have ever wanted, Tai…Toshiro."

Toshiro opened his mouth to protest when he suddenly remembered what he had said earlier; he glared at Rangiku, who offered him a small smile. He huffed, she may have used his name, but he wouldn't give her the satisfaction of using hers.

Even if he was dying to try her name…

"There is nothing here for you, Matsumoto. There never was," he said, and Matsumoto _was_ disappointed he didn't use her name.

"You're here." Toshiro fought back a blush and decided to turn around. Matsumoto decided it was her time to ask questions. She neared her Taichou little by little until she let her hand brush his slightly.

"Why do you want me gone so badly?" she asked, trying to take hold of his hand. She was smiling at not finding any resistance from his part.

Had she looked a little closer she would have seen he had his eyes closed and was frowning, tensed and immersed in an internal struggle.

"If only…Taichou, I really mean what I said the other day," she said, this time grabbing his hand and turning to face him. "I really care for you; I think…I may have feelings for you."

This time she did notice his expression, he opened his eyes but kept looking in front of him. Matsumoto frowned and decided since he hadn't said or showed his discomfort she could press a little. Lifting her hand she caressed his face softly where there was an evident bruise forming around his eye. She had been curious about those bruises earlier when she saw him; with whom had he fought to receive them?

"Who did that to you, Taichou?" she asked again, trying to get something from the young man in front of her.

Rangiku completely ignored the internal struggle of her Captain, that's why she was so surprises by the sudden lift in his reiatsu and the ash that separated them almost immediately.

Rangiku's eyes opened wide in surprise when she saw Haineko in front of her growling at Toshiro, who was looking back at her and Haineko with cold black eyes.

"Haineko!" replied a surprised Rangiku, but the Ash-cat ignored her while her eyes kept glaring at Toshiro.

"I told you, if he ever tried to hurt you again I wouldn't stand aside to see how he does it," said Haineko. "You should keep your distance from him; take your time before approaching him again like I advised you!"

Rangiku looked over at her Taichou who was smirking amusedly, one single eyebrow lifted while his eyes were gleaming before turning to look at Rangiku.

"You should follow your zanpakutou's advice, woman," said Toshiro and this time Rangiku stood up narrowing her eyes at the young man in front of her. The one looking at her with black eyes and talking to her with a deep, loud voice that wasn't like her Taichou's at all.

Rangiku tried to go closer but a push from Haineko stopped her. She glared at Haineko who glared back; suddenly there was her Taichou again. One hand covering his eyes and the other clenched in a painful grip.

"This is why…" Toshiro let out a frustrated growl; he looked at Rangiku, who looked back at him clearly confused as to what had happened. "Just go, Matsumoto. What happened just now and last night…should be enough for you to leave me alone."

They looked into each other's eyes and Rangiku understood what was left unsaid. She understood, at least partly, why he was so adamant for her to not be near him. Why hadn't she seen it before? Even with all his changes, with his new attitude, he was still trying to protect her. Or at least that's what she was hoping for.

Deciding she and her Taichou needed some time, she ordered Haineko to return to her before turning around and walking to the door. She wouldn't leave, however, without letting him know whether he liked it or not that she wasn't leaving him alone facing whatever was happening to him

"How can I leave when it's so obvious you need me?" Toshiro looked at her out of the corner of his eye and saw a sincere smile on her face before she left the office.

Toshiro sat down on his chair; putting a hand on his face he mumbled, "But I don't need you. I never did and I won't…I don't need anyone... they would only be a nuisance."

* * *

It was a late night in the middle of the summer.

Ichigo was finishing his last patrol and was a little anxious to return home. Even after all this time and all the things that had happened between them he was still unsure about the whole 'living together' deal. Even if they weren't living together technically.

But it wasn't only Rukia and their living status that had him so nervous; it was his father's words earlier in the day. The man had approached him with a single box with a beautiful ring made of silver and a single red gem.

'_You're getting too old and she isn't getting any younger. You have to make a decision sooner or later about Soul Society's proposition,'_ he had said, and then he thrust the ring into his son's hand and left.

What was the man thinking? Ichigo was only sixteen! He couldn't possibly be thinking of him and…and Rukia and…no, he was too young for…for such a commitment.

Besides, Renji and Byakuya would kill him if he dared to do such a thing.

And still….

His father was right about something – he had to make a decision. He couldn't be torn in between two worlds for too long.

Ichigo's thoughts were interrupted by a familiar and yet unexpected spiritual pressure. His eyes opened wide in surprise when he recognized traces of an Arrancar, and apparently it was friendly.

Making his way towards the source he could sense his friends already moving towards the same place he was heading. Ichigo was sure the same thought was crossing everyone else minds. Who was this Arrancar and how bad could it be?

* * *

Rangiku gave her Taichou and herself some time. Days became weeks, and those weeks became two whole months in which they had little contact, and only for official missions.

It was kind of strange for Matsumoto to not be there to bother her Taichou, to try and share some time with him but at the same time she didn't let it bother her so much.

She still tried to help him and be there for him, even if he didn't notice it was she who always sent him his favourite cup of tea with his favourite food. She was also happy to do outside work instead of being inside the office, it gave her time to train by herself and interact even more with the squad and her friends.

Her time away from Hitsugaya also gave her the opportunity to search for answers about her Taichou's strange behaviour.

It wasn't that she didn't accept he may have changed and become a complete git, because that was also a possibility. Nevertheless, knowing the young Captain for so long and being used to his reiatsu should account for something; she should be able to tell that there was something different.

But her quest for answers always took her to unknown and scary territory and there were only a handful of people who could help her clear the matter. Three of them were already dead and the others…all of them lived in the Real World.

"Mhm, is never good when you look so serious, Ran-chan," commented Kyouraku, taking another sip from his cup. "It is something wrong?"

Rangiku merely smiled, shaking her head, "No, not at all. Just thinking when I can escape to visit Orihime-chan and maybe go shopping."

Kyouraku knew there was something else; there was always something else when Rangiku preferred tea over sake. "Maybe you should ask for some vacation days?"

"I don't think that would be possible, Taichou." Both Rangiku and Kyouraku turned to a serious Nanao who had an official envelope in her hand that she promptly gave to Matsumoto.

The woman took it with surprise and read it over eagerly to know what had happened.

"What do you mean, Nanao-chan?"

"Something happened in the Real World and Ukitake-soutaichou is sending a group to investigate," said Nanao, who stared at her Taichou for a moment before giving Rangiku a soft smile. "He thought it would be good for Hitsugaya-taichou and Rangiku to investigate and gather all the information they can."

"How convenient! This is a real coincidence, eh Ran-chan?" said Kyouraku delighted to hear the news. He wasn't aware of the nature of the investigation but he knew this would be a good opportunity for Hitsugaya to leave Soul Society and try to calm himself a little, and of course it was the opportunity Rangiku was waiting for.

Toshiro clenched his teeth and glared, full of contempt, at Ukitake who was clearly ignoring him. Matsumoto was waiting for him near the senkaimon with a soft and confident smile on her face.

"What is the meaning of this?" Ukitake smiled at him.

"The Tenth Squad has been selected by Urahara himself to go to the Real World and help with the investigation," said Ukitake. "I thought it was a good opportunity for you and Rangiku-san to return to a place you already know."

Toshiro looked over at Matsumoto who was anxious to leave, and for some reason he knew there would be some unnecessary luggage behind her.

"This is a mission, not a holiday," he said in a firm tone. Matsumoto nodded her head but the gleam in her eyes told Hitsugaya his words didn't affect her enthusiasm.

For the first time in the two months they had been apart Toshiro stopped himself to really look at her. With a feeling of dread and longing he wondered how he could be apart from her for so long and how would he make it out of the mission in one piece.

He growled inwardly, knowing too well the seal had already lost its power to hold back his inner voice and why Urahara was so adamant for him to return to the Real World.

With some last instructions and some noisy good-byes from Rangiku and Kyouraku, both of them left.

The moment they arrived to the Real World, Soul Society's prison, known as the Maggot's nest, was missing one familiar and cunning prisoner.

* * *

So yeah, this is it. Some new things that would bring next chapter what I hope would be a good fighiting scene and some...Gin time.

Thanks for reading and don't forget to leave a comment


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